All 2017

What high paying career should I choose in Singapore?

By on March 3, 2016 in All 2017

Some people say that Singapore is one of the most stable global economies in the world. Many people also say that many US & European MNCs like to base their regional headquarters in Singapore due to the ease of doing business in general.

However, it’s not all rainbows and butterflies in sunny Singapore (unless of course you count the moth invasion in 2014).

One issue many expats (& locals) have with working in Singapore is the cost of living.

To give you a general idea of what I’m talking about:

  • A new family car can easily cost more than a 100,000 USD (and you have to scrap it after 10 years or pay another XX,000 USD to keep it another 10 years).
  • What about a new, less than 400cc motorcycle? More than 15,000 USD.
  • Purchasing A 5 room public housing apartment can easily cost half a million USD.
  • A simple meal can cost about 5 USD if you find yourself in some canteen in an industrial park.
  • Parking charges in some CBD areas can go in excess of 4 USD per hour.

Taking the above into consideration, obviously, salary packages in Singapore have to get really high to attract top tier talents into the country.

But before you leave your current job to jump to Singapore, lets look at five jobs in Singapore that pay really well.

5 High Paying Jobs In Singapore:

1.) Specialist Medical Practitioner

In Singapore a specialist medical practitioner or surgeon in even a small private hospital can average a monthly salary of about S$20,000 or more. As you gain the years of experience, this number can increase exponentially. Becoming a specialist will require an extensive amount of education and training (both time and cost) but can be well worth it when you are making over S$240,000 a year.

Like most things in Singapore, the medical practice industry is highly regulated. You will need to convince the authorities that you are indeed fit, knowledgeable and well qualified enough to administer life saving medicines.

Foreign degrees in medicine can be recognized, but you may want to check with the Singapore Medical Council first before applying for such jobs in Singapore.

2.) An Advocate Or Solicitor

Lawyers in Singapore can make some big bucks. The average monthly salary for criminal lawyers is close to S$18,000 which averages to about S$200,000 a year. Like in most countries, keeping people out of jail is big business. Singapore’s judiciary system metes out punishments ranging from fines, jail terms and death by hanging for various offenses, and there is always some idiot out there who followed through on a bad idea and got caught. In fact, you should be able to find a fair share of such idiots.

With corruption being nearly unheard of in Singapore, the only chance some criminals have at staying out of jail or not finding themselves hanging off the business end of several yards of rope – is to throw everything in their bank accounts at some skillful lawyer who just might be able to put up a convincing argument in Court to secure a more lenient sentence. I would not bet or bank on this though.

Aside from criminal law, Marine law & Contract law are popular niches in Singapore.

With all that being said, freshly minted lawyers may find it hard to get a good paying placement in law firms at the beginning of their careers and may have to start off working for meager allowances, but like most things in life – persistence pays off.

3.) CEO Or Managing Director

If you are looking for somewhere to relocate and you have experience as a CEO you may want to search out some job positions in Singapore. The average monthly income for CEO’s in Singapore is often over S$15,000 a month. Each company will have a different structure and system in place to dictate the specific jobs duties of the CEO and the size of the company will have an effect on the amount you can expect to get paid. But, even small companies can sometimes offer up to S$180,000 in yearly income if you include all bonuses and stock options.

They say it’s lonely at the top though.

4.) University Lecturer

Becoming a University Lecturer will require you obtaining a master’s degree in your chosen field of specialty. University lecturers with high academic qualifications can make close to S$120,000 a year. Even university lecturers with limited work experience can make a handsome income by teaching part-time courses in private schools.

To get started, you would generally have to design your curriculum and do some self promotion to convince people that they should pay you to learn from you.

However, do note that teaching comes with all the “benefits” of having to deal with children and their children problems and marking their homework over weekends.

5.) Financial/Insurance advisor

Depending on your level of persistence and salesmanship, a population dense country like Singapore is an ideal place to get involved in financial advisory services. Distance between clients is short and it is easy to get referrals once you do a good job with a bunch. There are even cold calling services you can hire to quickly expand your client base. Licensing requirements are clearly defined by the Monetary Authority in Singapore.

Some insurance companies even include a monthly salary package for the first year or two of apprenticeship!

On the flip side, most Singaporeans in general have already been approached countless times by countless advisors to “review their current plans”. Some advisors can get pretty unscrupulous and dish out manipulative advise to churn sales. Some of them can get pretty persistent too. So you can expect less than fantastic returns on cold calling efforts and will need to find some other way to drive referrals.

Obviously there are other lucrative career options in sunny Singapore. You could always fly over and start a business. But labor laws in Singapore are pretty intense and the employment (including self employment) of foreigners must be done with an appropriate work permit. So before you make any hasty decisions – check out Singapore’s Ministry of Manpower website to understand the permits required before you start anything business activities in Singapore.

Exploring the Decision Making Process

By on February 8, 2016 in All 2017

Interestingly, the human mind has certain predictable tendencies when involved in a decision making process. So of course – somewhere, in some big college dealing with some “science” like sociology or psychology, some professor has put together a curriculum teaching the “sciences” behind decision making.

Apparently – the whole process of making a decision, whether a small or a big decision revolves around the following features.

Satisfiers vs. Maximizers

Satisfiers are people who engage in the decision making process once they “acquire a certain criteria”. So in people-speak, this means that they decide once they see an option that meets their expectations. Despite seemingly high criterion, satisfiers make instant decisions once they find what they are looking for. For example, if you are looking for a certain type of house and your agents shows numerous houses, and you turn them down. However, once you get the particular house you are looking for, you settle for that, and you have no need for checking out the remaining houses, you are as satisfier.

Maximizers, on the other hand, have to try everything out before making a decision. When looking for a house, they have to go through all the available houses that are for sale so that they can know that they have made the best option. Ultimately, maximizers tend to spend more energy during a decision-making process, and they are usually less happy than the satisfiers are.

So although they are maximizers, they have not maximized their happiness.

Explaining How Less Can Be More

Psychologists argue that we have the capacity to make snap decisions founded on limited information. I too argue the same thing.

Nevertheless, apparently we do not apply that, we tend to look for additional information and try to capture as much as we can and then end up getting confused. The decision making process is more challenging because of the Internet. Can you imagine simple life was, before the inception of Google? Neither can I (actually I can, because I am old enough to have existed when Google was just an upstart challenging the mighty Yahoo!). However, to be honest, the Internet has made everything more complicated, because we have to Google search the history of a car manufacturer, before deciding to buy something from it. Essentially, psychologists maintain that only the crucial information is necessary when making a decision, for instance, is the efficiency of the car. That also explains why psychologists chose to major in Psychology – they too made snap decisions based on whatever they happened to know at the time.

Types of Intuitions

There are three types of intuitions. The ordinary feeling or gut instinct is the common intuition when you know that it will pour later in the day. It is a vague intuition. Expert intuition is instant reflex, for instance when tennis pro knows the direction of the tennis ball based on the arc of the opponent. It is a swift intuition that works only in familiar situations. Strategic intuition is a clear thought that works in new situations, and it is always slow. Once your brain gets used to making certain decisions, you can make the subsequent decisions easily, unlike the first  decision-making process. Very often, the keenest sense of strategic intuition comes only just after the fact, or just as about something is going to go wrong. This is often confused with hindsight.

So what kind of decision maker are you? Will changing your decision making style ensure a better outcome? This is unlikely because regardless of how much you know – you cannot predict the future and there are about a gazillion ways for things to not go according to plan. So why are psychologists studying this shit and writing academic papers – justifying their existence in universities ? Why are people paying to learn this bull-shit and taking tests to test their understanding of these hocus-pocus theories? Why did you read this article in the first place? I am not a psychologist. In fact you likely have no idea who I am and I sure as hell know that I didn’t give you any useful data. If you were even slightly intelligent, you too would have known about half way through the article that I wasn’t planning on giving you anything useful.

In fact, the only real takeaway from this entire article is that you really need to make more careful choices about where and how you decide to spend your time.

Steps Followed in the Decision Making Process

By on February 8, 2016 in All 2017

In life, we are all faced with a variety of decisions. If fact it runs into several hundred decisions on a daily basis. Bet you didn’t realize that. Go ahead and count it through. I’ll wait.

In case you didn’t realize it, taking that second to decide whether or not you were going to count it was a decision you just made.

Although most decisions may seem easy to make when compared to the occasional life changer, a decision making process will help you view each decision as important and, therefore, handle it with the right level of seriousness. It is usually important to have a given decision making process to follow to make sure that each of the decisions we consider important is handled correctly. Unless of course you have absolute believe in faith and fate, then the rest of this article is irrelevant to you. So you can go ahead and move on to something else. Unless you believe it was fate that led you here, then you’d probably want to stay on. I personally still think you need a good decision making process to decide what to do, otherwise you would not have made the bad decision to read this article this far.

A good process ensures that you do not leave out important considerations in arriving at the final course of action. duh.

Below we will look at the different steps of the decision making process.

The first step in the decision making process is to take the time to identify the exact decision that needs to be made. I say this because many people are morons; they don’t listen when their employers give instructions or their wives give commands, or when their husbands make humble requests. People tend to often execute their thoughts without thinking about what they are doing and what they want to actually achieve. For example, a person may simply create a website with a random decision making application, not really knowing what the hell he might want out of it, then spend a bucket load of time maintaining it, still not knowing why he’s doing it. This same person may decide to write mindless drivel for posts, still not really knowing where he wants to go with it.

So it is important to define why you are doing what you are doing before you start doing it.

This involves taking the time to define the specific nature of the decision to be made. This is an important step as it charts out the exact problem to be addressed.

Once the decision is identified, you should take the time to collect information about the decision. Making an informed decision almost guarantees a better outcome as you will understand the problem to be addressed and how it can be addressed.

As you research about the decision to be made, you will identify some of the ways you can address the decision/problem. This step in the decision making process helps you come up with a list of alternatives that can get the required end result although in different ways.

Making a decision based on the different alternatives identified above may involve different consequences and processes. It is, therefore, better to first simulate outcomes based on each of the alternatives before choosing the most favorable one. This step helps come up with a prioritized list of decision alternatives.

Of course, the step above obviously assumes you have a boat load of time and very little else to fill it with.

Now that you have a list of prioritized alternatives, the next step in the decision making process is to choose the best course of action. It is important to note that this step can be as easy as just picking out the first alternative highlighted in the above step; alternatively it can include combining two or more of the alternatives above. On a side note – keep a look out for when I write an article about why you need a decision making process to end your decision making process.

At this point, all you need is to take action. You have already dealt with the hard part of the process and have enough information to have made a sober and informed decision that is bound to get you the intended results. Unless your decision was to take over the World, get a Degree, get married or something like that. If that’s the case – then the hard part is just beginning.

The last step in the decision making process is to review the consequences of the decision taken. This step is aimed at helping you; the decision maker gauges the effectiveness and reliability of the process. Note that it is okay to repeat some of the steps above in a bid to ensure that any mistakes made are corrected for a better end result.

Yeah, so it’s all a vicious cycle. Given that Murphy’s law is real and chances are shit is going to hit the fan at some point of time – it is very possible that all the time you spent making that decision was for nothing. Plus, to top it off there is ALWAYS going to be that 1 person who is going to tell you that you “should have known better, if it had been me, I would have…”.

A Guide for Your Decision Making Process

By on February 8, 2016 in All 2017

If you’re about to make a big life changing decision and you are trying to seek help to guide you; you have landed on the right page. This page is full of vague and generic guidelines that sound intelligent but are probably not useful. It is the kind of information you are expected to nod your head to but forget as soon as the conversation is over.But you seem kind of desperate so let’s move on.

It is very understandable that making a decision is very difficult for many individuals. After all, most big decisions require taking risks, and not many are willing to take those risks and face the consequences of their decisions. It is important to remember though, that taking risks and making smart decisions can eventually lead you to make great changes not only in your life but in others as well. These could be great and epic decisions that change your life for the better or the worse.

If you are in a decision making process of something as simple as what you are going to wear or eat today, don’t overthink too much. Generally, covering your private areas and not eating poison is a good way to move forward.

When it comes to clothes, the best attitude is to take into consideration what Harvey Specter said in the series Suits: “Your appearance is just as important as your talent.” Do not overdress but don’t under dress either. You don’t know who you will be meeting or who you might need to impress today, and this can either make or break you. But of course if you work in a construction site under the hot sun you might not want to put on a suit, lest you get a heat stroke and end up in hospital where you just might meet the man or woman of your dreams; in which case you’d want to be in a suit, which coincidentally is the reason you are in hospital in the first place. Life is often a vicious irony.

For your food, just think of the future. Will daily intake of super oily bacon on huge burgers have a good effect on your health in the long run? Do you think you’d still be as strong as you are today compared to your body ten years from now? You are what you eat so you might as well consider that as well. No jokes here, because this is serious.

For riskier choices and bigger things that you need to decide on, a more complicated yet still quite simple decision making process is involved. These decisions could be anything like whether it’s time to quit your low-paying but stable job and apply for a new one without a guarantee of stability or whether you should purchase your dream car when you already have a simple sedan that still functions well or begin applying for a mortgage so that you can finally live in your own home. Here’s a simple step-by-step guide that you can take into consideration. Please note that I would personally not follow these generic guides, but whether you want to do so or not is a choice that you will have to make:

  1. Set a time limit or a deadline for you to finally make a decision. Without doing so, you might make instant decisions later on without really thinking about it.
  2. Determine whether something is a “need” or just a simple “want”. Especially if this involves your finances such as buying a new gadget that you don’t really need, take time to question yourself whether it’s something you can afford. Sometimes you may feel like you need to reward yourself because you deserve it but then, do you really need this now? You can reward yourself with something even better later on anyway.
  3. Seek advice from someone you trust like your parents, your reliable best friend, your boss or a mentor. It is better if you get a “second opinion” from a trusted person who you believe has made very good decisions in the past. But of course, their decisions would probably have been made in completely different circumstances. So make it a point to listen to their inputs, but do not take their inputs as commands.
  4. Write down pros and cons. This may sound like it would take too much effort but writing down will help you a lot in the decision making process. Weigh your options and decide from there if it’s worth the risk.

So as promised, we end this article leaving you in no better position to make any decision, simple or otherwise. The fact, is that nobody can help to to predict the future and the World is round, so gravitational forces aside – it could technically roll in any direction. The most updated information that you use to make a critical decision today, could become obsolete information tomorrow. In fact, it will become obsolete information at some point of time. It could already be obsolete when you used that information to make your decision. There is almost no such thing as “evergreen” information. Even established theories in science are being proven to not hold true in every circumstance.

So good luck to you, my friend.

But while you are here, please give our random decision maker application a try. The link to the application ought to be easy enough to find.

Tips on How to Decide on the Best Home for You

By on February 8, 2016 in All 2017

When you decide to buy a home, you are confronted with a one of the most important decisions in life. Since the home is usually one of the highest value if not the highest value investment most people will ever make in their lifetime, making the right decision is vital. This is actually a very traditional thinking approach. In reality, in today’s brutal world, house flipping for a profit is a capitalist driven norm.

Anyway, let’s get on with the article.

When you start your house hunt, it is essential that you find the perfect fit, given that you will have to live in that house for years. Coming home to a house that you do not love to look at or step into can drive stress levels slowly (but SURELY), upwards.

The main factors to keep in mind when you make a decision on house buying include how much the choice in mind satisfies your needs and fits into your budget. Without keeping the right considerations in mind, your dream home could soon turn into your worst nightmare as soon as you move in. As with most other articles on this site, this is generic run of the mill advise, sometimes referred to as bull s*** advice. In all honesty, several other factors will come into play – like how far away you work, how much you need to fork out to renovate the place before you move in, how far away your parents live and so on so forth.

To help you out with this important decision, we will look at a few tips on how to decide on the best home.

Consider How You Live

Most people usually have a picture of how they want their house to look. However, it is important to realize that this mental picture can also lead you to choosing the wrong house. As a rule of thumb, it is recommended that you choose a home, according to your current living standards. When you turn house hunting into a random decision influenced by your whims, you increase the possibility of buying a home that may be too expensive for you in the long run. It is best to come up with a list of all the amenities you would like in a home and then scale it down to include the most realistic ones to guide you to make decision. Typically, a good housing agent will be able to guide you down the decision making path to enable you to make a proper assessment on whether your finances will hold up over the course of repayments for the home. Because buying a house is also an investment, you really should also consult your financial advisor. If you don’t have a financial advisor, it might be time to get one.

The Cost

Perhaps the most important factor when it comes to home buying is the cost. As previously stated, buying a home is always going to be an expensive endeavor. One of the most important tips on how to decide on a home is to consider all the associated costs before making any deals. Most people usually consider the purchase price and then leave it at that. However, remember to ask yourself whether you will be able to afford the month to month running costs. These expenses can turn a seemingly great decision into a nightmare after a short while. Before you make decision on a home evaluate any components or amenities that can result in incurring high monthly maintenance costs and how they fit into your budget.

Even with the tips listed above it is important to note that you decision to buying the right home will not always be as straight forward; making various compromises is a must. As a home buyer, you will need to compromise on various factors such as price, location and even the number of rooms and available amenities in the house. This, as it turns out may be the most important tip on how to decide on the right home.

We now end the article abruptly. If you have actually been paying attention to what you were reading, you would realize that you have learnt little.

But in summary:

  1. Buying a home is an investment that will impact your finances for years, so consult a financial advisor
  2. You may be able to buy your dream home one day, but you will have to usually for settle for something less than perfect, simply because life is such
  3. Gone are the days of buying a house and staying in it forever and ever, house flipping for profit is a new norm so don’t grow too attached to the wall paint
  4. Buying a new house cannot be a spot decision, you will have to plan ahead and keep aside enough cash to go through with it smoothly and painlessly
  5. Think about other costs like renovation and buying new appliances, or you may just end up in an empty palace (which is actually not so bad).

How to Decide On the Best Career Path

By on February 8, 2016 in All 2017

Every one of us has that specific thing that we can do so perfectly without struggling or straining, or that thing which we felt so inclined to sit down and learn as a child, for whatever reason.

Ideally, the activity which you excelled at naturally forms your career choice. But this decision has to be made at an age where you wouldn’t have trusted yourself to make that decision. What a conundrum.

Keen parents who have the best interests of their children at heart can actually guide them on how to decide on the correct career path that they should take. This is because parents can see the characteristics and the interests of their children from a very young age, which can point towards a successful career in the future.

But keen parents also generally just keenly wish that their children eventually earn big bucks and meet society’s definition of success. What the child is talented is, is usually never a concern.

Anyway, even though your parent does/ does not get involved in your career choice, you as a person have the ability to make decision on the best career path that you should take. There are many factors that you should consider before making the decision on the career path that you shall follow. The first and perhaps the most important is the passion you have for what you are thinking to do. Although this is not the only thing that you should think of, it is very important to be passionate about what you want to do because when things get tough you will find enough reasons to keep you going. Also a touch of reality helps. If you have a passion for drawing but really cannot draw, you might have to settle for a diluted passion in something else.

Another thing that can help you make the decision on the best career path to follow is finding out what you are good at. This will ensure that you do not struggle and strain doing what you cannot do. A career in which you can always be the best is very motivating, and the sky is the only limit for its growth.

Understanding your hobbies can help you know how to decide on the best career that suits you best. Hobbies can be turned into real income earning careers that can be very helpful to you as well as your neighbors. Turning a hobby into a career will make sure that you enjoy and pride in your day to day activities even when the going gets tough. the internet too, is full of sites that promise to teach you how to turn your hobbies into income. Generally, these are not helpful, unless you want to learn how to start your own website teaching others how to earn income online.

After graduating from the University, many graduates struggle to get jobs immediately. At this point, you may find job opportunities that are not related to your career at all. Random decisions to take any job opportunity that comes your way can become the defining moment as far as your career path is concerned. You can discover other interests that you may be having by taking careers that you never even thought of in the first place.

Think about how Facebook got started. A random decision to satisfy a certain need that you or people around face on a daily bases without getting a solution can also point you to your future career path. These decisions have lead to big careers and businesses that earn millions of money for just fulfilling a simple need that people living in a certain community or country face.

Make Decision on What to Sell on the Internet

By on February 8, 2016 in All 2017

If you are planning to start and run a business online, the very first thing that you need to decide on has something to do with the product or service that you are planning to offer. That step is not always that easy. After all, you cannot just make a random decision when it comes to such a selection because it can determine the overall success of your venture. Moreover, if you are imagining over night success and untold riches, you are in for a rude shock. The more carefully planned the product or service is, the less rude of a shock you are going to receive.

Perhaps you have already settled your mind and are sure of the type of enterprise that you are planning to start. However, there is a tendency that like many others, you may be inclined strongly towards a few products without really knowing how to make decision in one way or another. For example, if you are in the blogging line, you might be torn between two niche themes, or if you are in the movie production business, you may be unsure if you should pursue product commercial shoots or full blown movies (or perhaps something more risque, but this is mostly a family friendly blog so that discussion will be out of scope).

What You Need to Do

Before investing your money, effort and time, it is very important to make sure that your concept of a product or a service fits with the current dynamics and the demand of the market. This means that you need to know how to decide on the basics, and understand that a project that is complex may require a combination of several factors: your expertise and skills, as well as the consumer expectation. This only means that you need to fully understand what your customers want and then understand if your product of service will meet that demand.

To start, you need to sit down and draw plan. Design a brief and well thought out survey, which may be provided to your potential customers in order to understand how they potentially feel regarding the products and services that you want to offer. You may decide to speak to other retail sellers in order to see what they are searching for and identify the reasons, which may make them replace their suppliers (with you of course).

Know Your Customers

It is very important to touch base with your consumer group. Keep in mind that supporting your product or service is not always a random decision on the part of your customers. In fact, if they need to spend any money – random is the last word to use that decision they will be making. You may reach out to consumers by putting up an informative website. You can compile email lists by talking to people or from random visitors of your website. You may even decide to invest some money and put up a booth at a local trade show. You can prepare your prototypes and demonstrate how your product or service can help your customers. You may choose to hold such demonstrations at flea markets and fairs.

Inform yourself regarding the online market. Read as much as you can about online businesses and keep yourself updated about your industry. This entails knowing about its performance history and the current trends. Use the information that is currently available from different sources to specific research statistics in order to make decision for your specific industry.

Finally, the decision to start a business may not have been taken lightly – don’t take a decision to quit lightly either. If the first attempt fails, try again. If you keep failing, keep trying. Obviously – if you have tried your absolute level best several times and met with utter failure and mounting debt each time, you may need to reconsider your aspirations and be practical about the likely direction of entrepreneurial abilities.

Online Social Media Jobs – You can get paid up to $25 per hour to be on Facebook?

By on October 21, 2015 in All 2017

Did you know that you can get paid to do simple jobs online at  social media sites such as Facebook?

There are thousands of businesses around the world and in your local area looking to hire people
just like you to work on simple tasks such as:

  • Posting Facebook comments
  • Moderating Facebook groups
  • Uploading photos and tagging people
  • Generating Facebook ‘likes’ and followers

Click Here to get started

Most of these jobsites don’t require any prior experience and the only skills you need are a good knowledge of how to use Facebook which is the best online social media job in 2015.

Paid Social Media Jobs jobsite is currently hiring people worldwide for a wide range of Facebook jobs, so if you would like to get paid to spend time on Facebook to making money from home. Hurry and sign up now!

Positions are filling fast. Apply Below:


Hard Work Does Not Always Pay Off – Yes or No?

By on August 10, 2015 in All 2017

When you throw yourself at your job day in and out – you’d expect some recognition, yes or no? Surely you would. Unfortunately, the reality of the working world is very different.

So here’s a reality check.

1. Managers often reward the people they like more often than the people who perform. They are human after all. Many managers will look for reasons to justify a good performance rating for a direct report they like, instead of ranking performance objectively. You really cannot do much about this, because these discussions usually take place behind closed doors.

2. Your manager’s definition of “good performance” may be very different from yours. He or she may simply want someone who keeps his mouth shut and does his basic work. Your boss may not appreciate the continuous improvement programs you like to initiate – even if these are clearly good for the business. Your risk taking affects your boss, who may be risk averse. Although they may take some leadership credit for a job well done, they will still fear the backlash if the job is not well done. They will remember this fear even if the project was successful.

3. Many managers do not appreciate people who are smarter than them. They may also hold a strong disillusion of their own abilities in the first place. Both these scenarios don’t well for you, yes or no?

4. HR may not think you are ready for a promotion even though they know nothing about you at all. This happens a lot in organisations that try too hard to create a damn matrix of measurement for everything even something as unique as promotion readiness for roles. HR then starts waving a magical wand that blesses and curses on many factors, with actual work performance being one consideration alongside many other mundane ones.

5. Your skill set may not suit the future plans for the company. You may be a beast with Excel, but perhaps the company wants to move transaction capture into SAP.

6. Maybe you could have “played the game” better, yes ? Your Excel skills may have given the company amazing dashboards, data analysis capabilities and macros operating like they run on AI, but perhaps the company thinks Jane from accounts is more deserving, because she didn’t know enough Excel to automate her tasks, resulting in her spending way too much time in the office after hours. The management saw the hours she put in and got impressed with no idea of the incompetence inherent in her nature. In the end both jobs got done, hers and yours. Only difference being she had to work crazy impressive hours and you did it the smart way and Jane got rewarded for it.job funny fired joke

Children Are Great- Yes Or No?

By on August 10, 2015 in All 2017

Before you decide to have children, you better be aware that your life will change if you do. Maybe for the better in some ways, but definitely for the worse in many ways. Ask the parents around you and they will agree with you – yes or no? As a matter of fact, why not ask your own parents for a start?

For a start, your standard of what is “acceptable hygiene” will change. A long time ago, you may have never gone to bed on a bed drenched in urine. After having kids, you will learn that there are many work arounds to this. For example – sleeping on the non drenched side, placing a water proof mat over the drenched side or if you are tired enough – just ignoring it and going to sleep wherever on whichever side. These are all viable options – yes or no? You say no? Well that means you have not had kids yet. How about getting up close and personal with your baby’s poop several times a day? Does that does that sound fun for you? If it does, then after you see a shrink – then you can make a decision on whether you should have kids or not.

Secondly, you will learn to cherish “me time” – if you get any of it that is. Here too, you will learn work arounds. You will soon realise that the easiest way to get extended “me time” is to extend the time you spend in the bathroom by an extra 30 mins everyday, perhaps even an hour. In many cases, the bathroom is the final frontier, simply because that is the only place in the house where a parent can lock himself or herself up safely away from the children.

Thirdly, you can forget about sleeping in late. You may recall that you loved to sleep in late as a child. Rest assured; your memory is deceiving you. You trust me when I say that yes? Think hard, and you will realise that the desire to sleep in late only appears later in your childhood. In the first few years of a child’s life they tend to wake up early. As early as possible in fact, so that they can start their day of play.

Lastly, discipline is a word that children do not understand. That means you get to stand and watch helplessly as they scream they heads off in shopping malls, or sit and drive helplessly as they scream their heads off in the car, or lie down and pretend to sleep as they scream their heads off before falling asleep. Oh you think I am being over dramatic don’t you?

funny joke about new fathers changing diapers

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